Menopause Cafes (Season 5, Episode 5b)

Menopause Cafes (Season 5, Episode 5b)
Guests:Lisa Scully; Nathalie Bonafe

(Music / Open)

Janet: In this series we will be discussing specific examples of design techniques that make a positive difference for people living with certain human conditions.

Carolyn: The more a designer understands the client and or the community the more effective and respectful the design will be.

(Music / Intro)

Janet: Welcome to Inclusive Designers Podcast, I am your host, Janet Roche…

Carolyn: and I am your moderator, Carolyn Robbins…

Janet: This episode is a little different than our other ones, but so interesting… and not just because it’s short!

Carolyn: That’s so true!

Janet: In our most recent episode, we had a wonderful multi-generational discussion on Menopause and Design. Joining me on this panel… Doctor Nathalie Bonafe, Doctor Erika Eitland, and Lisa Scully… experts in the world of design and menopause.

We explored the different stages of menopause, how it affects women in the workplace, and of course, design solutions…

Carolyn: We think it is a very timely topic, and hope you’ll take a listen to that episode, or maybe you have already. You’ll find it on our website, as well as all the other places you get your podcasts.

Janet: Yes, please do.

Carolyn:  During that episode, the topic of Menopause Cafes was brought up. And we decided we needed to continue this discussion and give it its own spotlight. I’m calling it our “…but wait, there’s more to the story” episode.

Janet: I love that! Two of our experts—Dr. Nathalie Bonafe and Lisa Scully— have great knowledge of Menopause Cafes. They have facilitated them both online and in person. We felt it was important to share just what these cafes can do, and how to find one if you or someone you know needs help or support going through these life stages.

Carolyn: And with that, here is our intriguing and informative look at Menopause cafes…

(Music 2 – Interview)

Janet: Hello and welcome to Inclusive Designers Podcast. I am your host, Janet Roche. Today we are going to be talking a little bit about menopause, and we’ve got a couple of experts on here who will be talking to us about the trials and tribulations that women go through with menopause. So, I’m going to dive right on in, and I’m going to ask them to go around the room and introduce themselves briefly. So, we are going to go to Lisa Scully…

Lisa: Thanks, Janet. I’m Lisa Scully. I am a licensed menopause expert champion with Menopause Experts Group, based in the UK, but they’re part of an international company. I’m an organizational development professional as well. So I work with different organizations with regards to taking the organizations through change, processes, but particularly specializing in menopause in the workplace.

Janet: Thank you, Lisa.

Lisa: Thanks for having me.

Janet: And next up we have Dr. Bonafe…

Nathalie: Hello Janet, thank you for having me here. Hello everyone, I’m Nathalie Bonafe. So I am a woman’s health advocate, specialized in transitions. So you can call me a coach or a doula. A woman who serves at two transitions at menopause and at end of life. That’s me.

Janet: Great. So thank you to everybody for being here. It’s such an important topic. You know, these Menopause Cafes can be a great resource. That would have been so helpful to me.

Nathalie: So yes, the menopause cafe concept is also coming to us from the UK. So, it started in 2017, and it started to be hosted in Scotland by Rachel Weiss. And basically when I had the idea of, you know, having conversations about menopause about 4-years ago. I googled it and I found that it already existed so I connected with Rachel, and I was able to bring it here.

So the cafes are actually a concept of no agenda. Safe-slash-brave spaces for anyone who want to talk about those topics. (Janet: hmm). It’s recognized as educational, supportive, but menopause cafes are not medical per se. I often have a co-host or a guest who is a retired physician who comes. So we sometimes can discuss some of the medical options, but this is not a place where you find solutions.

This is a space for community and sharing experiences confidentially. There’s no recording. I don’t sell anything that I do. We share experiences. We share resources as well, articles, et cetera. (Janet: right). And this is really, um, just really beautiful space. (Janet: right). and we laugh…

Janet: Okay, you got to laugh about some of the menopause, right?

Nathalie: We laugh, we joke, we cry together, we hear, we listen to one another.

Janet: Well, that’s just it, that you know that you’re not alone, right? It’s such an important and strong message, right?

Nathalie: Yeah, and people come from all over the world because I do them online. It started during COVID. It really allows people to come from all over. South America, Europe, China. (Janet: That’s terrific). But some people do them, uh, especially in the UK, they do them in person.

Janet: Right. That’s great.

Nathalie: You know, people like Lisa or me— and there are more and more people throughout the world now— could be invited to some of the rooms, (Janet: yeah). You know, so Boston is not that far away or anywhere, you know, we could be part of the conversation and give some feedback. (Lisa: hmm).

So that I think, we talk to so many women, (Lisa: yeah), I cannot write all the stories. (Janet: chuckle). I’ve been hosting menopause cafes just virtually for 4-years now. I have like 400-women have come in. I don’t record them because this is a, I would say as safe as it is possible for everybody to come in. But really, you know, brave space and people share a lot. (Lisa: yeah). They share a lot. (Janet: right). And just, uh, we may not be able to put it on paper because it’s confidential, but if you had a meeting, you wanted to say, ‘Hey, can you run it by us?’

Lisa: Yeah, that’s it. We’re all about creating space, aren’t we? Because that’s what it is. It’s creating space for conversation in a safe and friendly environment. So, actually, even if there was a question you wanted to ask or, you know, just feedback generally, or, you know, just to, we could facilitate that conversation for you, you know, or connect you into those conversations or connect you into people, because a lot of these people come back over and over again, don’t they? They grow in confidence, but they’ve had a lot of life experience, a lot of stories to tell. (Janet: oh, yeah). Yeah.

Nathalie: I get to work with a lot of women and a lot of women with invisible diseases. (Lisa: yeah). So these invisible disabilities that they’ve never named, but that prevent them from being active, so I help them, you know, just find meaning or purpose.

So these stories of any color, I mean, people who were mistreated, you know, by the medical system, (Janet: right), treated for depression while they were menopausal, you know. (Janet: right). So whatever you, you’ve all brought up, we could have constructive stories, or we could connect you with people who can help you more specifically. Because that’s what we do. We’re facilitators, Lisa, right? (Lisa: yeah).  This is how we see ourselves. We fill the gaps.

Lisa: It is about us speaking up as we are now. It is about us empowering others to speak up because the voices get louder, don’t they? (Janet: right).

Nathalie: We want women to talk to one another and to exchange regardless of their situation, their education, their skin color, etcetera. (Janet: right). Originally based in the UK, but it’s now really global. (Janet: yeah). And I love being part of that group because we grow together the awareness. So you can Google it and find it. And mine is, uh, the one here is called Menopause Cafe Connecticut.

Janet: That’s great, thank you.

Nathalie: Thank you and be well.

Lisa: Thank you Janet, thank you.

Janet: Thank you very much.

(Music / Outro)

Janet: I wish I knew about these menopause cafes sooner myself. It’s wonderful to know that there is a place to get information on what’s going on, share experiences, and get some much-needed support.

Carolyn: For so long, women have been raised not to talk about menstruation at any age. Rachel Weiss started the café concept in Scotland to get conversations going and break the stigma. And she is still leading the way. I understand they even have annual ‘Menopause Festivals’!

Janet: I believe it’s now celebrating its fifth year! If you want to learn more about the festival, or information on finding a virtual or physical café near you, check out the ‘resources’ listings on our website for these episodes.

Carolyn: Absolutely! And speaking of which, if you want to learn more about ‘Menopause and Design’ in the workplace, take a listen to our other episode.

Janet: For information on contacting Dr. Nathalie Bonafe, Lisa Scully, or Erika Eitland…  as well as links to what was talked about during both discussions… you’ll find all that and more on our website at: Inclusive-Designers-dot-com.

Carolyn: That’s: Inclusive-Designers-dot-com…

Janet: A big thank you to Lisa, Nathalie and Erika! And, again, to all of you for listening.

Carolyn: Along with all the regular places you get your podcasts— such as Apple, Spotify, and Pandora— we are now on YouTube Music which replaced Google Podcasts.

You can also find us on our regular YouTube Channel. What hasn’t changed is our name – Inclusive Designers Podcast. And of course, if you like what you hear, feel free to go to our website and hit that Patreon Button, or the link to our GoFundMe Page.

Janet: Yes, please do. And let us know if you have any questions or suggestions for topics we should be covering in upcoming shows!

And as our motto says: ’Stay Well…and Stay Well Informed!’

As always, thank you for stopping by.

We’ll see you next time.

Carolyn: Yes, thanks again.

(Music up and fade out)